Picoftheweek

Picoftheweek
Waaaaaaaay too many to count...

My Statement

"Let me emphatically say that I am not anti-Facebook (Fleecebook), anti-smart phone, anti-Microsoft, anti-Apple, anti-Google or anti-Internet. I do believe, though, that the consumer is being ripped off of his privacy, identity and purchase history. We are being herded into a Facebook corner where what we "Like" and where we go physically and on the net will be scrutinized and sold numerous times to actually corrode and erode our culture while tempting us only with convenience, high tech and flashing video screens. The unsuspecting consumers need to be aware..." - Gary Lapman

Quote of Note

“If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.”-W.C. Fields

"For the strength of the Wolf is in the Pack, and the strength of the Pack is in the Wolf." - Rudyard Kipling

"Common sense is not so common. " -Voltaire

“Fame is vapor, popularity an accident, riches take wing, but only character endures.” - Matthew McConaughey

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him"

"Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason" - Jerry Seinfeld

"Fleecebook is free, you (and your identity) is the product!" - Gary Lapman


"Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we're here for something else besides ourselves." - Eric Sevareid

"'Smart' phones are only smart for the cell phone providers!" - Gary Lapman

"On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question." -- Charles Babbage (1791-1871)

“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.” -Albert Einstein

"Technology creates the illusion of companionship without the intimacy of friendship." - unknown

"No worry, there's an app for that..." - Gary Lapman

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Deadlines to make and people to see...

The new year began with a looming deadline that many of us worked very long hours including weekends to result in a successful task.  I am worn out and burned out, but recovering and happy that that one is over.

Next weekend I have a friend's birthday party to attend and then my wife an I are going on our usual January diet (to combat Thanksgiving and Christmas overeating).  I wish that our schedules allowed regular exercising and that the lure of overeating AND eating the wrong things (like sweets) wasn't so tempting.  Recently, we had a local beer tasting which was very interesting and fun.  Unfortunately, that has lent to drinking better beer a bit more frequently.  It all adds up...

Last night we went to see "The Imitation Game" and I would highly recommend it.  Any of us that has been part of the computer industry from early on (certainly not its inception) would appreciate the story about Alan Turing.  It was not only informative, but made me feel proud to be part of the early industry surrounding computers and their development.

Isn't interesting that we were just getting used to not seeing political ads and election crap (sic) in the papers, AND not it is back with the hype about 2016.  One thing to remember, a leopard doesn't change its spots, no matter what.  That goes for skunks and stripes, too.  If they were not really a viable candidate (for a good reason) in the past, they haven't changed....



 Crazy News Tidbit

Anxious to 'include' as many minorities, religions and disabilities as possible, the human resources department of the University of Alberta has put up a Braille poster outside its main office. The poster has been placed inside a display case with a glass front.

[This is brought to you by the same geniuses who put braille instructions on the drive up window at the bank.] 




Annual Stella Awards

Once again, it's time to review the winners of the Annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself & successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.

7th Place

January 2000: Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000.00 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running amok inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving tike was Ms. Robertson's son.

6th place

19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles, California, won $74,000 & medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently did not notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal the hubcaps.

5th place

Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He could not reenter the house because the door connecting the house & garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family were on vacation & Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found & a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the house owners insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

4th place

Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 & medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been a little provoked at the time, as Mr. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

3rd place

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500, after she slipped on a soft drink & broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

2nd place

Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor & knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was trying to crawl through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 & dental expenses.

1st place

This year's winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor Home. On his trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph & calmly left the drivers seat to go into the back & make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the Motor Home left the freeway, crashed & then overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him, by reading the owner's manual, that he actually could not do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.

 

A Little Mixed Up

Just a line to say I'm living,
That I'm not among the dead.
Though I'm getting more forgetful
And more mixed up in the head.

For sometimes I can't remember,
When I stand at foot of stairs,
If I must go up for something,
Or if I've just come down from there.

And before the fridge so often
My poor mind is filled with doubt
Have I just put food away?...or
Have I come to take some out?

And there's times when it is dark out,
With my night cap on my head
I don't know if I'm retiring
Or just getting out of bed.

So...if it's my turn to write you
There's no need of getting sore,
I may think that I have written
And don't want to be a bore!!

So, remember..I do love you
And I wish that you were here,
But now it's nearly mail time,
So I must say good-bye my dear.

There I stood beside the mail box
With a face so very red
Instead of mailing you my letter,
I had opened it instead!!

My bifocals fit - my dentures are fine
My hearing aid works...but ..I do miss my mind!!!

-- Author Unknown



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