It is actually AMAZING that Sarah Palin can be so consistently annoying. She has been relatively quiet about Egypt, until recently. Jack Cafferty says of Palin speaking, "It's usually a lot of feathers - not very much chicken"! She is so very good at mouthing off about some (any) topic that is completely unknown to her. I'd bet she couldn't point out Egypt on a map! I am wondering whether she has been directed by (or hired by) the GOP to stir up things, create controversy...
Farts are our friends.....immediate ease
They're sort of like a rectal sneeze. Lightning's a meterological wonder,
But angel farts produces thunder.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away,
But a bowl of beans keeps the world at bay.
Gas passed in silence is an expartee;
Who's the farter, and who's the fartee?
Dinosaur farts were damn distinct;
That's what made 'em become ex-stinked.
Antarctic penquins are cool because
Their farts don't smell until they thaws.
You Might Be A Redneck If...
. . . you vacuum the sheets instead of washing them. . . . you’ve ever valet parked a snow plow.
. . . you’ve ever stood in line to have your picture made with a freak of nature.
. . . you break wind in public and blame it on your kid.
. . . you’ve ever had to siphon gas from your lawn mower to put into your truck.
UNFAIR LABOR PRACTICES
The Ontario Ministry of Labor claimed a small Shelburne farmer was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him. Ministry of Labor employee: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.
Farmer: Well, there's my farm hand, who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.
Then there's the mentally challenged worker. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of Scotch every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.
Ministry of Labor employee: That's the guy I want to talk to.....the mentally challenged one.
Farmer: That would be me.
