It sure is bizarre the way things worked out. We were so looking forward to being empty-nesters, if even for a short while... Someone told us that you are really not empty-nesters until the family dog dies. Well Zoe had to be put down, Tori left for school and Ev moved back in. Now we have Max, Tori is back for the summer and Ev is still here. Our only hope is to move into a one-bedroom condo...!
Top ten reasons why the bible would be different if it
were written by university students.
10. The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning, cold.
9. The Ten Commandments would be actually only five, double-spaced, and written in large font.
8. Promiscuous females would be pissed, not stoned.
7. Forbidden fruit would still have been eaten, anything is better than college food.
6. Paul's letter to the Romans becomes Paul's e-mail to abuse@romans.gov.
5. Reason Cain Killed Abel: they were flatting together and the dishes weren't getting done.
4. The time and place where the end of the world occurs would be lecture theatres in October.
3. Mary would have made a complaint to the sexual harassment committee concerning Gods unwanted advances.
2. The reason why Moses and the followers walked in the desert for forty years: they didn't want to ask
directions and look like freshmen.
1. Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until
the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.
Bumper Stickers
A waist is a terrible thing to mind Alcohol and calculus do not mix. Do NOT drink and derive.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Clones are people 2
Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.
HONK if you hate noise pollution
I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.
I don’t find it hard to meet expenses… they’re everywhere!
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone!
I wonder how deep the ocean would be without sponges!
Why does the funeral home raise its prices and blame the cost of living?
My wild oats have turned to shredded wheat!
Never play leap- frog with a Unicorn!
Our drinking team has a hockey problem!
