What happens to the rear window memorial script on Latino cars when they sell their car and get another? Do they get it applied again or have they had it long enough ? [I have always wondered about that.]
What happens when people that are overly tattooed or pierced apply for a job [maybe that doesn't happen]? I'm just wondering what impact those people have on the unemployment rate....I mean, those that are unemployable.
Give me a break! Michell Bachmann has a clinic where you "pray away the gay"! That is the way to GET ELECTED. She is shooting herself in the foot. We knew she was an extremist, but not quite how far out....
Hurricanes
Just when you think you have heard all of the stupid things that are going on in the US -- this comes along... What happens when people that are overly tattooed or pierced apply for a job [maybe that doesn't happen]? I'm just wondering what impact those people have on the unemployment rate....I mean, those that are unemployable.
Give me a break! Michell Bachmann has a clinic where you "pray away the gay"! That is the way to GET ELECTED. She is shooting herself in the foot. We knew she was an extremist, but not quite how far out....
Hurricanes
Black hurricanes....
Well, it appears our African-American friends have found yet something else to be pissed about. A black congresswoman (this would be Sheila Jackson Lee, of Houston), reportedly complained that the names of hurricanes are all Caucasian sounding names.
She would prefer some names that reflect African-American culture such as Chamiqua, Tanisha, Woeisha, Shaquille, and Jamal. I am NOT making this up!
She would also like the weather reports to be broadcast in 'language' that street people can understand because one of the problems that happened in New Orleans was, that black people couldn't understand the seriousness of the situation, due to the racially biased language of the weather report.
I guess if the weather person says that the winds are going to blow at 140+ MPH, that's too hard to understand
I can hear it now: A weatherman in New Orleans says...
Wordup, muthas! Hehr-i-cane Chamiqua be headin' fo' yo ass like Leroy on a crotch rocket! Bitch be a category fo'! So, turn off dem chitlins, grab yo' chirren, leave yo crib, and head fo' de nearest FEMA office fo yo FREE shit.
All you Need to Know about Government Bureaucracy:
Pythagorean theorem:................................24 words.
Lord's prayer:......................................66 words.
Archimedes' Principle:..............................67 words.
10 Commandments:...................................179 words.
Gettysburg address:................................286 words.
Declaration of Independence :....................1,300 words.
US Constitution with all 27 Amendments:..........7,818 words.
US Government regulations on sale of cabbage:...26,911 words.
SORT OF PUTS THINGS INTO PROPER PERSPECTIVE, DOESN'T IT?????
And I don’t like cabbage
The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word from the dictionary; alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one letter; and supply a new definition.
Here are the winners:
1. Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund that lasts until you realize it was your money in the first place.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic Fit: The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug: Satan, in the form of a mosquito, gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor: The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
And the winners are:
1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
6. Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door while wearing only a nightgown.
7. Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
