A Stormy Campaign

As I sat and watched the coverage of the Sandy hurricane's devastation of the east coast, I was surprised at how quiet the formerly (G)OP became.  Romney had to eat his words again about dissolving FEMA, when, again, it is need most of all.  Obama just acted Presidential and got things moving, while shedding the red-tape AND best of all is his newly formed relationship with Christie in New Jersey.  I got the impression that that Governor felt that he had endorsed the wrong candidate.  The campaign took back-seat to the disaster AND before you know it, it will be voting day- AND, by now everyone has forgotten the debates.  I predict that the victor in this campaign will be second-termer POTUS.

Halloween Quickies...
Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist? To improve his bite...

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? It had no guts...

Why do witches use brooms to fly on? Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy...

How do witches keep their hair in place while flying? With scare spray...

Who was the most famous French skeleton? Napoleon bone-apart

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? No, they eat the fingers separately...

Why don't skeletons ever go out on the town? Because they don't have any body to go out with...

What do ghosts add to their morning cereal? Booberries...

What is a vampire's favorite sport? Casketball...

What is a vampire's favorite holiday? Fangsgiving...

What would a monster's psychiatrist be called? Shrinkenstein...

What did one ghost say to the other ghost? "Do you believe in people?"

What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes? A cereal killer...

Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends? They're so wrapped up in themselves...

What kind of streets do zombies like the best? Dead ends...

What does the papa ghost say to his family when driving? Fasten your sheet belts...

What is a vampire's favorite mode of transportation? A blood vessel...

What is a ghost's favorite mode of transportation? A scareplane...

What type of dog do vampire's like the best? Bloodhounds...

What is a ghoul's favorite flavor? Lemon-slime...

What does a vampire never order at a restaurant? A stake sandwich...

What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument? A trombone...

What do birds give out on Halloween night? Tweets...

Why do vampires need mouthwash? They have bat breath...

What's a vampire's favorite fast food? A guy with very high blood pressure...

Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal? He heard it had great circulation...

Delaware Decision
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her USA government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.

Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware"