Captain Cardiac Reigns...

Well the BP well in the gulf is temporarily plugged.  I hope it holds.  What is really scary is that the large weight of the cap plus the internal pressure of the oil could rupture the pipe.  That kind of a structural failure could be worse that what we had, as there isn't a "defined" way to plug that.


Also, do we have a mini-Toyota-ism going on with Apple ?  Did they really know about the antenna issue long before the phones were shipped to customers ?  I believe that they will recall them, but they have to have a solution ready and shipped to the the AT&T stores before they opt for a swap.

Tonight we are going to see Captain Cardiac and the Coronaries at Chase Palm Park.  I imagine that it will be hot and very crowded, but nonetheless, fun.

Tori and Aidan are going to Red Rock to swim, in spite of the extremely high temperatures there (probably 105).

A 75 year old man went to his doctor's office for a sperm count
test. The doctor gave the man a jar, told him to take it home and
return the next day with a sample.

The next day, the 75 year old man reappeared at the doctor's
office and gave the doctor the jar, which was as clean and empty
as on previous day. The doctor asked what happened.

"Well, doc, it's like this: First I tried with my right hand, but
nothing. Then with my left... still nothing. Then, I asked my
wife for help. She tried her right hand... but nothing. Then her
left... still nothing. She even tried with her mouth, both with
and without her teeth... and still nothing. We even called the
lady next door and she tried with both hands and her mouth too,
but _still_ nothing."

The doctor was shocked. "You asked your neighbor?"

The old man replied, "Yep, but no matter what we tried we
couldn't get the damn jar open!"

NEIL ARMSTRONG'S SECRET

ARMSTRONG'S SECRET, GUARANTEED TO MAKE YOU SMILE In case you didn't already know this little tidbit of trivia, it might make you chuckle when you read it.

ON JULY 20, 1969, AS COMMANDER OF THE APOLLO 11 LUNAR MODULE, NEIL ARMSTRONG WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO SET FOOT ON THE MOON. HIS FIRST WORDS AFTER STEPPING ON THE MOON, "THAT'S ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN,ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND," WERE TELEVISED TO EARTH AND HEARD BY MILLIONS.*

BUT JUST BEFORE HE RE-ENTERED THE LANDER, HE MADE THE ENIGMATIC REMARK "GOODLUCK, MR. GORSKY".

MANY PEOPLE AT NASA THOUGH IT WAS A CASUAL REMARK CONCERNING SOME RIVAL SOVIET COSMONAUT. HOWEVER, UPON CHECKING, THERE WAS NO GORSKY IN EITHER THE RUSSIAN OR AMERICAN SPACE PROGRAMS.

OVER THE YEARS MANY PEOPLE QUESTIONED ARMSTRONG AS TO WHAT THE 'GOOD LUCK, MR. GORSKY' STATEMENT MEANT, BUT ARMSTRONG ALWAYS JUST SMILED.

ON JULY 5, 1995, IN TAMPA BAY, FLORIDA , WHILE ANSWERING QUESTIONS FOLLOWING A SPEECH, A REPORTER BROUGHT UP THE 26-YEAR-OLD QUESTION TO ARMSTRONG.

THIS TIME HE FINALLY RESPONDED. MR. GORSKY HAD DIED, SO NEIL ARMSTRONG FELT HE COULD NOW ANSWER THE QUESTION.

IN 1938, WHEN HE WAS A KID IN A SMALL MID-WESTERN TOWN, HE WAS PLAYING BASEBALL WITH A FRIEND IN THE BACKYARD. HIS FRIEND HIT THE BALL, WHICH LANDED IN HIS NEIGHBOR'S YARD BY THEIR BEDROOM WINDOW. HIS NEIGHBORS WERE MR. AND MRS. GORSKY.

AS HE LEANED DOWN TO PICK UP THE BALL, YOUNG ARMSTRONG HEARD MRS. GORSKY SHOUTING AT MR. GORSKY.  "SEX! YOU WANT SEX?! YOU'LL GET SEX WHEN THE KID NEXT DOOR WALKS ON THE MOON!"

DMV

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license. First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test The optician showed him a card with the letters 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.' 'Can you read this?' the optician asked. 'Read it?' the Polish guy replied, 'I know the guy.'

A RANCHER'S OUTLOOK & COMMON SENSE APPROACH TO LIFE.   

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old rancher, who's hand was caught in the gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Obama.
The old rancher said, 'Well, ya know, Obama is a 'Post Turtle''
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him, what a 'post turtle' was.
The old rancher said, 'When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a 'post turtle'.
The old rancher saw the puzzled look on the doctor's face so he continued to explain. 'You know he didn't get up there by himself, he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put  him up there to begin with'.