My son was busy all evening with the end of "Lost". I thank him fervently for not subjecting us to it at home!
My visit to the dentist today was less eventful than I expected. All that he did was grind it down a bit and send some options to the insurance company. I guess they will dictate what gets done. A fine mess our medical services have become....
Max was already hopping up and down to go for a walk when I got home and opened the front door.
Lesser Known Metric Units
Despite never having adopted the metric system for day to day life, Americans are familiar with the basic units, like grams (especially kilograms), meters and such. But when it comes to lesser known units, they're clueless, so we thought we'd help the educational process along a bit.
* 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
* Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
* 2,000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
* Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
* this is also known as an onosecond
* Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
* Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
* 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
* Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
* 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
* Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
* Shortest distance between two jokes = 1 straight line
* 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
* 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone
* 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
* 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
* 2200 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
* 52 cards = 1 decacards
* 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton
* 1,000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
* 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
* 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
* 10 rations = 1 decoration
* 100 rations = 1 C-ration
* 2 monograms = 1 diagram
* 4 nickels = 1 paradigms
* 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
and...
* 100 Senators = Not 1 good decision
Murphy's Laws of Combat
* If the enemy is in range, so are you.
* Incoming fire has the right of way.
* Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire.
* There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.
* The problem with the easy way out is that it has already been mined.
* Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
* Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.
* The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
* when you're ready for them.
* when you're not ready for them.
* Teamwork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at.
* If you can't remember, then the claymore IS pointed at you.
* The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack.
* A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
* If your attack is going well, then it's an ambush.
* Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.
* Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing.
* If you build yourself a bunker that's tough for the enemy to get into quickly, then you won't be able to get out of it quickly either.
* Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
* If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone.
* When you've secured the area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
* Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.
* Friendly fire isn't.
* If the sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
* Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when you can sleep.
* The most dangerous thing in the world is a second lieutenant with a map and a compass.
* There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
* A grenade with a seven second fuse will always burn down in four seconds.
* Remember, a retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
* If at first you don't succeed call in an air-strike.
* Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.
* Everything always works in your HQ, everything always fails in the colonel's HQ.
* The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
* One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.
* A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet for mud and rain.
* Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you never miss. Whenever you are low on ammo, you can't hit the broad side of a barn.
* The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
* Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
* Interchangeable parts aren't.
* No matter which way you have to march, its always uphill.
* If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove ANYTHING.
* For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. (in boot camp)
* The one item you need is always in short supply.
* The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.
* The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
* Airstrikes always overshoot the target, artillery always falls short.
* When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down, the most important ones are always illegible.
* Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.
* The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want, but they know for certain what they DON'T want.
* To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
* The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the M60.
* The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
* When you have sufficient supplies & ammo, the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack. When you are low on supplies & ammo the enemy decides to attack that night.
* The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Congressional Medal Of Honor.
* A Purple Heart just goes to prove that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
* Murphy was a grunt.
Parvinder and Habib are beggars in Vancouver and beg in different areas of the city.
Habib begs just as long as Parvinder but only collects $5 to $10 every day.
Parvinder brings home a suitcase FULL of $20 bills, and drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage-free house and has a lot of money to spend.
Habib says to Parvinder 'I work just as long and hard as you do but how do you bring home a suitcase full of $20 bills every day?'
Parvinder says, 'Look at your sign, what does it say'? Habib's sign reads 'I have no work, a wife and 6 kids to support'.
Parvinder says 'No wonder you only get $5 - $10!
Habib says... 'So what does your sign say'?
Parvinder shows Habib his sign.
It reads, 'I only need another $20 to move back to Pakistan'.
Important Message for all Nature Lovers, Campers, and Hikers.
Camping, hiking or working in wild country can lead to close
encounters with bears, and because each species may react in a
different way, it is important to know how to tell them apart.
With the increase in bear attacks in recent years, Parks Canada
has come up with some strategies to keep you safe. Although you
don't want to startle a bear, you do want to let a bear know you
are in its vicinity. By tying a small bell to your jacket, the
gentle sound will be will heard and the bear will head in the
opposite direction. Just in case you still find yourself face to
face with a bear, also carry a can of pepper spray.
Under field conditions, bears are rarely in plain view; usually
they are partially hidden by shrubs, trees or rock. The next
strategy is to learn which bears are in the area you are
visiting, i.e. Black Bears or Grizzly Bears.
The foolproof way to tell, is to look for bear scats (droppings).
You can examine these scats to identify the foods consumed by the
bear. If the scats have a sweet fruity smell, and contains
berries, you can be sure it from a Black Bear.
If the dropping smell of pepper and contain tiny bells, you know
it's a Grizzly Bear.
----
Here's another way to tell Brown bears from Grizzly bears.
First, as soon as you see a bear, climb up the nearest tree.
If the bear climbs up the tree and attacks you - it's a Brown
bear.
If the bear pushes over the tree and attacks you - it's a
Grizzly bear.
* 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
* Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
* 2,000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
* Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
* this is also known as an onosecond
* Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
* Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
* 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
* Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
* 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
* Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
* Shortest distance between two jokes = 1 straight line
* 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
* 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone
* 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
* 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
* 2200 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
* 52 cards = 1 decacards
* 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton
* 1,000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
* 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
* 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
* 10 rations = 1 decoration
* 100 rations = 1 C-ration
* 2 monograms = 1 diagram
* 4 nickels = 1 paradigms
* 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
and...
* 100 Senators = Not 1 good decision
Murphy's Laws of Combat
* If the enemy is in range, so are you.
* Incoming fire has the right of way.
* Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire.
* There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.
* The problem with the easy way out is that it has already been mined.
* Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
* Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.
* The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
* when you're ready for them.
* when you're not ready for them.
* Teamwork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at.
* If you can't remember, then the claymore IS pointed at you.
* The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack.
* A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
* If your attack is going well, then it's an ambush.
* Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.
* Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing.
* If you build yourself a bunker that's tough for the enemy to get into quickly, then you won't be able to get out of it quickly either.
* Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
* If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone.
* When you've secured the area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
* Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.
* Friendly fire isn't.
* If the sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
* Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when you can sleep.
* The most dangerous thing in the world is a second lieutenant with a map and a compass.
* There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
* A grenade with a seven second fuse will always burn down in four seconds.
* Remember, a retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
* If at first you don't succeed call in an air-strike.
* Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.
* Everything always works in your HQ, everything always fails in the colonel's HQ.
* The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
* One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.
* A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet for mud and rain.
* Whenever you have plenty of ammo, you never miss. Whenever you are low on ammo, you can't hit the broad side of a barn.
* The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
* Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
* Interchangeable parts aren't.
* No matter which way you have to march, its always uphill.
* If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove ANYTHING.
* For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. (in boot camp)
* The one item you need is always in short supply.
* The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.
* The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
* Airstrikes always overshoot the target, artillery always falls short.
* When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down, the most important ones are always illegible.
* Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.
* The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want, but they know for certain what they DON'T want.
* To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
* The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the M60.
* The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
* When you have sufficient supplies & ammo, the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack. When you are low on supplies & ammo the enemy decides to attack that night.
* The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Congressional Medal Of Honor.
* A Purple Heart just goes to prove that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
* Murphy was a grunt.
Parvinder and Habib are beggars in Vancouver and beg in different areas of the city.
Habib begs just as long as Parvinder but only collects $5 to $10 every day.
Parvinder brings home a suitcase FULL of $20 bills, and drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage-free house and has a lot of money to spend.
Habib says to Parvinder 'I work just as long and hard as you do but how do you bring home a suitcase full of $20 bills every day?'
Parvinder says, 'Look at your sign, what does it say'? Habib's sign reads 'I have no work, a wife and 6 kids to support'.
Parvinder says 'No wonder you only get $5 - $10!
Habib says... 'So what does your sign say'?
Parvinder shows Habib his sign.
It reads, 'I only need another $20 to move back to Pakistan'.
Important Message for all Nature Lovers, Campers, and Hikers.
Camping, hiking or working in wild country can lead to close
encounters with bears, and because each species may react in a
different way, it is important to know how to tell them apart.
With the increase in bear attacks in recent years, Parks Canada
has come up with some strategies to keep you safe. Although you
don't want to startle a bear, you do want to let a bear know you
are in its vicinity. By tying a small bell to your jacket, the
gentle sound will be will heard and the bear will head in the
opposite direction. Just in case you still find yourself face to
face with a bear, also carry a can of pepper spray.
Under field conditions, bears are rarely in plain view; usually
they are partially hidden by shrubs, trees or rock. The next
strategy is to learn which bears are in the area you are
visiting, i.e. Black Bears or Grizzly Bears.
The foolproof way to tell, is to look for bear scats (droppings).
You can examine these scats to identify the foods consumed by the
bear. If the scats have a sweet fruity smell, and contains
berries, you can be sure it from a Black Bear.
If the dropping smell of pepper and contain tiny bells, you know
it's a Grizzly Bear.
----
Here's another way to tell Brown bears from Grizzly bears.
First, as soon as you see a bear, climb up the nearest tree.
If the bear climbs up the tree and attacks you - it's a Brown
bear.
If the bear pushes over the tree and attacks you - it's a
Grizzly bear.
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