Nasty day today. I was in a meeting until after six. I don't think they pay us enough for the aggravation presented today.
In spite of that was a beautiful warm day and every chance I got outside for a few minutes, it was heavenly!
Better than work, work, work....
the local paper. During the interview the reporter noticed that
the yard was full of children of all ages playing together. A
very pretty girl of about 19 served the old man and the reporter,
keeping them in fresh tea and running errands for them.
"Are these your grandkids?" the reporter asked.
"Naw, sir, they all be my younguns," the old man replied with a
sly grin.
"Your kids?" said the reporter. "What about this beautiful young
lady who keeps bringing us tea? Is she one of your children too?"
"Naw, sir," said the old man. "She be my wife."
"Your wife?" said the surprised reporter. "But she can't be more
than 19 years old."
"Thass right," said the old man with pride.
"Well, surely you can't have a sex life with you being 115 and
she being only 19," the reporter remarked.
"Sir, " said the old man. "We have sex every night. Every
night two of my boys helps me on it, and every morning six of my
boys helps me off."
"Wait just one minute," said the newspaperman. "Why does it only
take two of your boys to put you on, but it takes six of them to
take you off?"
"Cause," the spry old man said with a balled fist, "I fights
'em."
A freshman at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the
Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair on January 26.
In his project he urged people to sign a petition demanding
strict control or total elimination of the chemical "dihydrogen
monoxide." And for plenty of good reasons, since it can:
1. cause excessive sweating and vomiting
2. it is a major component in acid rain
3. it can cause severe burns in its gaseous state
4. accidental inhalation can kill you
5. it contributes to erosion
6. it decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes
7. it has been found in tumors of terminal cancer patients
He asked 150 people if they supported a ban of the chemical.
One hundred forty-three said yes
Six were undecided
Only one knew that the chemical was...
Water!
The title of his prize winning project was,
"How Gullible Are We?"
He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to the
alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of
everything in our environment.
The conclusion is obvious.
Two bowling teams, one of all Blonds and one of all Brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City. The Brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus. The Blond team rides on the top level.
The Brunette team down below is whooping it up having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the Blonds upstairs.
She decides to go up and investigate. When the Brunette reaches the top, she finds all the Blonds frozen in fear, staring straight-ahead at the road, and clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.
She says, "What the heck's goin' on up here? We're havin' a grand time downstairs!" One of the Blonds looks up and says, "Yeah, but you've got a driver!"
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